Letters to Young Girls

Dear Friend,

– “Mother, is it true that all the boys look at pornography?”

– “Of course not, my dear Mathilda. There are still boys who don’t want to sully their eyes, their hearts and their souls with that kind of content.”

– “At school, some boys were caught looking at some on their cell phones, and a few girls talked about this. The teacher then said that all the boys look at this and that this was normal.”

– “Your teacher is not quite right. It is true that many boys and men look at it perhaps, but certainly not all. There are also some girls who look at it. With Internet, access to it is so easy today. For example, a male or female friend can challenge us, send us an address and we then end up on that kind of a website. At first, curiosity prompts us to have a look and see what it’s about, but very quickly, we come out of it with something broken in us and that is a heavy burden to carry.

You know, we as parents, put a parental filter on your devices, precisely to protect you from those terrible wounds and to avoid your finding yourselves faced with those disgraceful pictures. In fact, there is a great danger of developing a serious dependency on pornography. It’s sneaky, sly. We consume it and then, at one point, we no longer have enough of it; we are unable to stop it and it becomes a need that has to be fulfilled several times a week. And for some people, it becomes a daily need, more and more degrading and then we sink even deeper.

Many people who are faced with that problem, experience a great inner shame, guilt, a disgust which weigh heavily upon their hearts. Often, they become unable to concentrate on their studies or at work and this can lead to depression. All the beautiful and simple things in life no longer make them happy. It is so sad! What is worse is that they are no longer able to really love and have a sound, wholesome relationship with others.

You must be aware of those dangers so as to stay away from them because, one day, whether this be at school or with friends, in a sports or recreational activity, when you will not be at home, you may be faced with a situation in which you will have to say “no” if you want to prepare yourself for authentic love. You will need willpower not to give in to group pressure and the strength to say that you think the body – created to transmit life in true love, respect and tenderness – is too beautiful and too great to be reduced to a sexual object. And don’t forget that God will always help you.”

Mathilda’s mother looks at her daughter and asks her gently and kindly: “Tell me, dear, did you see the pictures those boys were looking at? Those pictures impress themselves on our minds and our memory in a very troublesome, lasting and indelible manner. A brief moment of curiosity – because we want to know and understand – and we find ourselves troubled for a long time. Is it really worth voluntarily satisfying that curiosity, knowing that we are hurting ourselves and creating our own misfortune by having to live afterwards with difficult after-effects? If you saw those pictures without wanting to, you must tell yourself, especially, that this is not the love of two persons who love one another; that isn’t how things are.

To maintain your purity, you will have to fight even more against such pictures which keep coming back to your mind. Pornography is not love; it is the consumption of bodies and sexuality, without any heart and for profit, to make lots of money by using the weakness of the flesh in man or in order to corrupt because when we are corrupt, we don’t want to be alone in our dejection, wanting to draw others with us in order to calm our conscience.”

Never forget this; the body and procreation are sacred. True love is grand, beautiful and marvelous! However, it is something that is built up and prepared. Choose authentic love! Keep yourself pure! Pornography does not help us ascend. Stay away from it, without seeking what can hurt you. Your parents, with whom you can talk, will always be able to help you.

The Daughters of Mary